{"product_id":"socialism™-fairness-perfected-heavy-cotton-tee","title":"Socialism™ - Fairness Perfected - Heavy Cotton Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eSocialism™ thanks Existential Garnish for this guest brand spot on its greedy, selfish, free-market-capitalist website. For more information: SocialismInc.com.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThis t-shirt design for Socialism™ says on the front: Socialism™ Fairness Perfected. Happiness Overrated. The youngsters (and others who should know better) are finally going to get what they've been whining for: absolute fairness. Nobody doing worse. Nobody doing better. Good thing those folks will never have another idea, inkling, impulse and\/or ambition to get ahead. Earn more than the other guy. Own something more than the other gal. You know: be recognized more favorably than the next because of personal drive, vision or skill. No, they'll all just revel in the perfect fairness of it all. Ahh, sublime.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is the t-shirt design available on this product as determined by the collective, and these are the prices required to sustain the collective. The collective has spoken.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnd now, a brief bout of necessary capitalist groveling about this product:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAnd now, some brief but necessary capitalist groveling about this product:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eA sturdy heavy cotton tee — medium-weight 100% cotton with a classic relaxed fit and crew neckline. The print stays sharp and the colors hold wash after wash.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eAbout the tee:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMedium-weight 5.3 oz\/yd² fabric, 100% cotton made with ethically grown US cotton\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eClassic fit with a crew neckline for comfortable, relaxed wear\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eTear-away label — no itchy neck tag\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSeamless body with reinforced shoulders keeps its shape wash after wash\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eIndependently certified free from harmful substances\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMachine washable\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eHeads up: the white version may look slightly off-white rather than bright white\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMade to order — please allow about 2 weeks for delivery\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Socialism","offers":[{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":47642294583468,"sku":"55251589998554785243","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":47642294616236,"sku":"17381873949978258747","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":47642294649004,"sku":"85891700114382981830","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":47642294681772,"sku":"12246817776957035989","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":47642294714540,"sku":"17359643079681934665","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":47642294747308,"sku":"97218415232211505982","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":47642294780076,"sku":"25608504100824137476","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":47642294812844,"sku":"26805372035150666765","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":47642294845612,"sku":"30119538376776399757","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":47642294878380,"sku":"30010090920698367226","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":47642294911148,"sku":"41794473009436046720","price":36.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":47642294943916,"sku":"90982176971455205160","price":36.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4XL \/ White","offer_id":47642294976684,"sku":"84009245811227771301","price":37.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4XL \/ Black","offer_id":47642295009452,"sku":"26551116529287110236","price":37.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"5XL \/ White","offer_id":47642295042220,"sku":"28575477112504175982","price":38.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"5XL \/ Black","offer_id":47642295074988,"sku":"21429913856290663883","price":38.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0642\/0126\/1228\/files\/14188381138870982975_2048.jpg?v=1792248225","url":"https:\/\/existentialgarnish.com\/products\/socialism%e2%84%a2-fairness-perfected-heavy-cotton-tee","provider":"Existential Garnish","version":"1.0","type":"link"}